Grief Recovery Institute Featured Question - Why me? is a pretty logical question in your circumstances, even though there's no real answer. (Published 8/28/2012)

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Why me? is a pretty logical question in your circumstances, even though there's no real answer. (Published 8/28/2012)

I keep asking myself why me? My son in November, my dad in January, and now, my oldest daughter. Everyone wants to know why I’m so weepy. I have one daughter left [and three grandchildren] and I panic if I don’t hear from her a couple of times a day. I need peace. Apparently I’m a beast they think should be heavily medicated, but my mind overrules that. Thanks for listening.

A Grief Expert Replies:

_Hi Lorrie,

When we read a note like yours, with loss after loss after loss,we always think of someone drowning in the ocean. Every time their head starts to come above the surface, another wave comes and pushes them under.

Why me? is a pretty logical question in your circumstances, even though there's no real answer.

We'd guess you’re weepy because your heart is broken. We're surprised that the people around you don’t get that. But remember, we live in a strange world that wants us back at our desk at work, 3-5 days after the death of someone important in our life. And they want us to look good, feel good, and be productive.

And of course when you’re grieving, which usually includes crying and not necessarily being at the top of your game, then they want to medicate you.

We're thrilled that you're ruling out the drugs, because for the most part all they do is cover up the pain, they don’t make it go away. In the meantime, it gets worse inside of you.

We’re on your side, but as you probably figured out, “time won’t heal your broken heart.”

So, if you’ve read some of the other responses we’ve made to reader questions, you know that now is the time we’re going to tell you - Go to the library or book store and get a copy of The Grief Recovery Handbook. Read it, and then start taking the actions it outlines – either with a partner or on your own.

From our hearts to yours,

Russell And John

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Ask The Grief Experts

Why me? is a pretty logical question in your circumstances, even though there's no real answer. (Published 8/28/2012)

A Grief Expert Replies:

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